I'll Be Back Soon

D. fed the kids while I was out. But he needed me to clarify the instructions on the box of macaroni and cheese. I love him dearly, but... really??? Clearly he needs to be in charge more often. If it's the same at your house, call me and we'll go do something!

If You Shouldn't Go Grocery Shopping While Hungry

clearly you shouldn't be bringing 2 hungry boys along either. A trip for 3 things resulted in 5 bags and $125...

I Just Found

a big bag of Halloween lollipops in the back of my cupboard. Clearly it is time for tidying and reorganization! What does it say about me that I hovered over the garbage can for several minutes and then put it back. Lollipops don't go bad, do they?

They're a Great Team

This morning D. and I woke up to our sons proudly bringing us breakfast in bed. M. operated the toaster, P. buttered and cinnamoned the toast. P. got out the bottle of juice, M. poured it. M. scooped out the yogurt for the parfait, P. put the berries in. P. decided ice cream would be good, M. scooped it. P. sang up the stairs, M. carried the tray.

Could they be any cuter? That's why I write this stuff down, so we'll all remember.

14 is My New Favorite Number

Last week I was shopping in Kohl's and on impulse tried on two pairs of pants, one a size 14 and one a size L. They both fit! I don't know why, since scale keeps flashing the same big number, but I'll take a gift like that when I can get it. I even went back to the racks to see what other colors they came in, but they were all ugly.

Today I found a credit from BonTon in my wallet from who knows when. I found 3 pairs of pants AND the acid test, a bathing suit! all in size 14. So I guess that number wasn't a fluke or a misprint. And if you have read somewhere that the world's clothing manufacturers are putting smaller size tags on the big clothes (they did that once didn't they?) please don't tell me. Since my store credit ended up to be a whopping $1.95 I only got one pair of pants and the bathing suit. I was so happy I celebrated with a banana split blizzard at DQ. Ok, so maybe that wasn't the best idea...

Birthday Party Realities II

1. If you are going to plan a birthday party, if at all possible try to stay away from the one weekend of the winter when a major storm hits. Using the excuse of it being March does not cut it here in WNY.
   
2. If that's not possible, just reschedule and move on.


3. At least the extra time gives you more time to clean the house.
   
4. Which can be a bad thing. All children at the party fall on your kitchen floor about 10 times. This has nothing to do with the fact that they are playing chase, because they do that every day. It is because the floor is way too clean -- there is no dirt to keep them stuck down.


5. So in the interest of safety, you have to invoke rule #1 from here and spill heavy whipping cream all over said floor. Naturally, in full view of all the guests. Try to swear quietly.
   
6. Thank goodness you have another pint hidden in the back of the fridge because the birthday boy likes to put the heavy cream in his cereal and to hell with being lactose intolerant! but send said birthday boy to the store for 2 cans of "fake" whipped cream just in case. Now you have 2 full cans of fake whipped cream just hanging around because there is no more dessert to eat them with.


7. And speaking of dessert, if one cake is good, then 2 are better. And a pie, and banana bread, and what the heck, put some cookies out too. And some berries for the cheesecake. And the whipped cream. Worry that you are an overachiever or channeling your mother who had to feed 12 people 3x a day. But notice that there were very few leftovers so either you are a perfect party planner or your guests are all just sugar addicts and will be buzzing around at 3 a.m. cursing you. At least the coffee was decaf.
   
8. If you are going to put 51 candles (because you need 1 extra for good luck) on a small cake, you had better be sure the birthday boy is in the room and the guests are ready to sing right then. The flames from 51 candles get pretty high! The children will be highly entertained by this and want to know if the smoke alarm will go off and if it does will everyone have to go outside and stand in the snow? The heat from all those flames will also make the wax candles melt extremely fast. The cute cake will not be so cute anymore after you pick all the wax from its icing, but it will still taste good.
   
9. If you think chocolate is a good gift for the birthday boy, everyone else will too. Fortunately, in this case he does not mind duplicates at all.
   
10. If you make a cute "50 Things We Love About You" book for the birthday boy, realize that all the party guests will read it before he gets a chance to. Which ended up being ok too.

Squirrel Energy

Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that we don't live in rural Alaska any longer. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that there are 3 grocery stores and a warehouse club within 5 miles of our house -- no planes, ferries or excessive shipping costs involved. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that this is the end of February and stocking up for winter is almost at an end. Sometimes we remind ourselves of all these things and fail miserably. Which is why D. came home from BJ's with 32 bottles of juice.

Grocery Shopping & Gender Differences

I forgot it was Super Bowl Sunday and went to the grocery store this afternoon. Not that I had any choice, all the cupboards were bare. And since there were many more men than usual in the grocery store, something I have noticed in the past became even more apparent. Maybe you've noticed it too? It seems that men and women grocery shop in very different ways. And I'm not talking about what's in the cart, I'm talking about the process. For instance:

Women wheel the cart around the aisles or carry the basket with them. Men leave the cart or the basket at the end of the aisle and carry armloads back and forth. (which can lead to an argument if you are shopping with your spouse and your purse or your child is in the cart)

Women wait in one place at the deli counter, trusting that the nice deli slicer person will remember our faces or our coat color and be able to find us again. Men follow the nice deli slicer person from slicer to slicer, up and down the counter. Women ask for "half a pound of Battistoni hard salami, sliced thin." Men point and ask for "half a pound of that."

Women use coupons. Men don't.

Women may or not follow a shopping list. Men, if they have been sent by their spouse, always have a list. And will still have to call home 3 times to ask for help finding the things on the list.

To be fair, you can substitute "Home Depot" for grocery store and reverse everything in favor of the men. Not that I intend to be stereotypical in any way, shape or form, you understand.

Autumn Has Arrived

How do you gauge the arrival of autumn? Back-to-school? Football? Halloween and Thanksgiving advertisements? Do you wait for the calendar's proclamation of "first day of"? Perhaps you check the trees for color changes or the temperatures for sweater weather.

Those are all good, but in our house (ok, it's really just me) this is how I know autumn has finally arrived. I did a little dance right there in Wegman's this morning. Happy happy happy. Since it's a seasonal item, I have this undeniable urge to stock up. What if they stop making it and I'm ciderless all winter? I did manage to stop myself at 3 boxes this week. D. even laughed when he helped me bring in the bags, "oh, it must be fall! You've got your fix again!" Sometimes it's those little things that make all the difference.

But I can't talk to you anymore because the microwave is beeping...

Lunchbox Etiquette

How long does it take before we all get the hang of this lunchbox thing?

I have a big note taped to my cupboard door with all the ingredients for a lunch that I run through twice every morning, while the 2 diners in question feel free to add their own comments (M: I don't want that! Can I have this? I had that yesterday! P: No! No! Yeessssss!). main course? check. fruit? check. snack? check. drink? check. utensils? check. decorative napkin? check. note from Mom? check. Ice pack? check. I load them into the backpacks. Oh wait, M. needs a 2nd snack for the afternoon, separate from lunch and labeled with his name. That goes into the front pocket of the backpack. Whew. Now I can relax about nutrition for a little while until they arrive home and I see how much they did or didn't eat.

As for the boys, they are still learning what is ok to save for later and what is not. M. brought home a lunchbox leaking drinkable yogurt and brown apple slices in the front pocket of his backpack. Do you know what drinkable yogurt looks like after 4 hours in a warm classroom and 30 minutes on a hot bus? Gag. Gag. Gag. "But Mom, you said not to save juice boxes, you didn't say anything about yogurt!" Ok, buddy, let's make that anything that's been opened and involves liquid or is remotely slimey.

What's the cost of those lunch tickets again?