7 Things About You at Age 7

• When you're not reading everything in sight, you're writing and illustrating your own stories.
  
• You still like to snuggle with a grownup and read chapter books together though.
  
• You just discoved Webkinz and all the online fun you can have with them.
  
• Chicken fingers are your new favorite food.
• You started karate and love it.
  
• You're very sensitive and empathetic and because of this, you've been visiting the school nurse a lot lately (mostly for reassurance).
  
• Art is still your favorite subject

• Woody from "Toy Story" is your almost constant companion (you have two of them).
• Lately you prefer to watch the outtakes from a movie rather than the movie itself.
• Your favorite book is "Too Many Toys" by David Shannon.
• Pasta is still your favorite meal, but now you'll eat mashed potatoes and gravy.
• Swimming is still your best thing.
• Cookie Monster makes you laugh really hard!  
• Ever since you saw "Ratatouille" you want to help cook dinner and read cookbooks.

R is for Respect

There are a lot of lovely words that begin with R: rain, radiant, read, reassure, recipe, reconcile, recycle, reflect, refuge, rejoice, relax, remember, rescue, resilience, reunion, reverie, revive, rhapsody, rhyme & romance.  

There are also a lot of ugly words that begin with R: racism, rage, rancid,  rat, reek, reject, renege, reprehensible, repress, repugnant,  revenge, ribald, ridicule, rigid, rotten, rubbish, rude & ruthless.

It's time to ban the ugliest R word from our vocabulary: retard.  

President Obama appeared on the Tonight Show this week and compared his bowling ability to the Special Olympics.  He apologized for the remark before the show aired and Special Olympics Chairman Timothy Shriver called it a teachable moment for the entire nation. Should the President have known better?  Sure.  Was he trying to be purposefully hurtful?  I don't think so (because those folks don't apologize).  Was he insensitive?  Sure. To me, it just shows how commonplace statements like this have become. The majority of people who use the word "retard" or "retarded" probably aren't even hearing the word when it comes out of their mouth, never mind connecting it to a real live person.  It's become a synonym for ignorant or doofus.  You hear this word every day, everywhere, from people of all ages. I'll admit that I used to say it when I was much younger and much much much stupider. I never gave a thought to what it really meant and I'm ashamed of that now.  It's a slur, plain and simple. And it hurts.  

It's also very inaccurate.  People with special needs are not retarded in their capacity and capability to love just like the rest of us. They are not retarded in their ability to learn, just like the rest of us.  They can function in the world and be productive members of their community, just like the rest of us.   However, people with intellectual disabilities and other special needs may not always be able to articulate their feelings. When they can't, it's up to us, the ones who love them, to say it.  It hurts everyone in our society when you use this word or otherwise treat them as 'less than.'  

From now on, let's use all the lovely R words more often.  Help eradicate one ugly one.  

Gee, Am I Really that Transparent?

D. thinks all this sorting and organizing is a thinly disguised attempt at avoiding finding a job.  Maybe a little, but it's more equal parts full-blown panic knowing that once I go back to work it'll never get done and plain old I've-had-enough-of-all-this-now.   I can't tell you how much better I slept last night because there were no piles of crap around the bed.  Sure, I should have had this revelation six months ago, but I procrastinate on everything, even revelations.  

Treasure Hunting

It must be cabin fever or maybe longing for spring, but I've been sorting, organizing and purging this month in a big way.  I've unpacked boxes that got shoved in various closets and piled in the basement when we moved into this house almost 5 years ago.  That would make me feel bad, but remember the part in The Incredibles where Helen tells Bob that it only took her 3 years to unpack the last box?  I'm not a superhero so I think that means I'm doing pretty well!  Part of me was a tad overwhelmed and thought, oh you haven't opened these boxes & bags in 4 years, just donate them all sight unseen.  But I had open them because there were things I'd been missing and worrying about, like:

• All my "good" jewelry (with the exception of my wedding band and gold bangle that was Nana Bertha's that I wear every day).  
• My flower girl dress from my sister G's wedding when I was six.  My sister K. sewed it to match all the other bridesmaid's dresses.  It's blue dotted swiss with net sleeves.  (Do they even still make dotted swiss?)  I LOVE LOVE LOVE this dress.  I'd like to shrink myself so I could wear it again.  The only childhood dress I loved more was my "rainbow dress" from when I was 7 but we didn't think to save that one.  I think I'm going to put it in a shadowbox or display it on my bedroom wall somehow.
• Ditto the little baggie of cloth diapers that came home with me from the hospital and the one decorated with pink ribbons that the nurses made for me to wear for the occasion.  There were no NICUs 45 years ago and these little diapers are a reminder of how much these ladies loved and cared for me for 3 months and how they wouldn't give in, especially after my twin Philip passed away.  These have to be displayed somewhere special.
• 2 boxes of checks.  I knew I ordered them! 
• 2 pairs of handmade gloves with fur trim and Athabascan beading.  A very dear friend made these for us when we lived in Holy Cross.  They're too nice to wear every day but I'm going to start wearing mine more often now that I've found them.  I also found some other beaded items that we got as gifts, some keychains, a credit card holder, some earrings.
• Video of the boys when they were very little.  I found 3 tapes earlier in the month but I knew we had taken lots more.  I found 5 other tapes today.  I haven't watched them yet but I'm guessing 4 of them are of them egging each other on in the Jolly Jumper and the Exersaucer.

And the treasure hunter in me was happy to find:

• 2 savings bonds
• $100 cash ($50 in each of 2 sealed envelopes with the boys names on them, no note or card or anything and it's not our handwriting.)  I opened a bank account with it and I think it'll be the start of our Disney fund.  (I know I should put it in the college fund but if we don't start saving the boys will be in college before we get there!)
  
• A bag of lightbulbs.  Considering that the kitchen light just burnt out and the drawer where we usually keep lightbulbs is empty, this is a good find.
  
• Some silhouettes that an artist handcut at a craft show when the boys were about a year old.  I totally forgot all about these.  Just looking at them brings back memories of that time.  I need a frame for these.  I'll probably find one in another box :-D
  
• My gargoyles.  I missed their ugly mugs.
• A new pair of pants that I bought at Target in... the receipt says April.  I have no memory of buying them, but they're rather nice and they still fit.

And then there was some stuff that was easy to donate or recycle:

• All the cards & ribbon bows from my baby shower.  I always had intentions of putting these in a scrapbook or something.   Oh well.  I've got lots more current things for the scrapbooks!  And I've still got the love, if not the cute little onesies and blankets.  Actually, we do still have some of those... remind me to post the photo of 6 yo M. wearing a 6 month size romper!
• All the miscellaneous bedding that didn't match or was for the wrong size bed.
• Lots of lots of crafts and stitching supplies.  I could probably get rid of a lot more but I didn't want the "now we can go and get more" instinct to kick in.
• My collection of perfume bottles and little china boxes.  They're pretty but they're just not me anymore, you know?
• Many years of Family Fun magazine.  Everything is online now anyway.  Ditto for all the other magazines I used to keep.  I kept the Simple Scrapbooks only because I do refer to them and they're going out of print.
• A bunch of books I've finally admited I will never read again.  This was not as hard as it used to be.
• Many plastic bags and other flotsam.  Apparently I packed our garbage.

Tropical Bird Massacre

Feather boas make good reins when you're playing all the variations of horse race.  I only hope the vacuum cleaner can handle the aftermath.

You'd Think I'd Know Better

I made the mistake of mentioning to D. that "gee, no one has been sick all winter!" 

Now the germs have decided to hold their annual convention here instead of in Tahiti.

Looking for a Job

I've been a SAHM since I was pregnant (I was a full-time student).  But now the time has come to re-enter the workforce.  I'm nervous about finding a job.  I'm nervous about actually doing it once I find one.  I'm nervous about finding a job that will still let me be home in time to meet the school bus.  If that's not possible, I'm nervous about finding a good after school program that we can all be happy with and that doesn't use up my entire paycheck.  I'm nervous about leaving all the stuff undone that I leave undone now - only with less style, grace and while having to wear pantyhose.  I'm nervous about appearing to be a functioning human being with a brain during a job interview.  For the most part, being a mom uses a whole different set of skills  - when was the last time you had to use the eyes in the back of your head in a job situation (teachers excepted)?

So what on earth do I put on the resume? Domestic Engineer & Chief Operating Officer have been done just a few too many times, but here are some jobs I'm quite good at:

Food Stylist.  For several years I have been able to make dinosaur chicken nuggets (or whatever food item my children are currently fixated on) look appetizing and different each night.  This is more for my benefit than for the person with the food jag,  because as long as they get to eat the item of choice they don't much care what else is on the plate.  (And please don't leave me a comment about how your kids eat escargot or whatever you put in front of them or how to be firm at the dinner table.  You pick your battles and I'd much rather argue over something really important, like how your pajama bottoms should always match the tops) 

Food Artist.  I can make pictures with food in an effort to get picky eaters to ingest more than the aforementioned dinosaur chicken nuggets.  And it works too!  Pictures of Blue's Clues rendered in cheese & salami, a horse and rider made entirely of pickles, olives, cheese and dried cranberries and other such artistic creations available on request.

Hormonal Grouch.  Just when my family thought they were safe, menopause starts nosing around.  On second thought, most workplaces probably wish they didn't have to pay the hormonal grouches they already have, so we'll just scratch this one from the c.v. why don't we?

Special Needs Educator to the Public.  Unfortunately, many people still express surprise that P. is able to walk, communicate and otherwise function in the world.   Whilst I still find this shocking, P. & I have been able to give a little primer on etiquette and reality with a smile and lots of patience.  And on P.'s part, lots of hugs.  

Twin Wrangler.  I have been able to feed two infants simultaneously without the aid of bouncy seats or high chairs, using only the limbs God gave me and a throw pillow.  I can buckle two wriggling boys into carseats without dumping my purse or the grocery bags.  I can look at a "crime scene" and know immediately whether one (and which one) or both children were involved.  I can get everyone to bed and asleep in... several hours.  

Family Photographer.  Literally thousands of examples available on request.  But if you want a photo of me, there aren't that many.  M. took one the other day that has most of my head in it.

Lustful Launderer.  This isn't a homemade porn video, honest.  (With these stretch marks!?)  I do like to iron and folding laundry can be meditative, but I just like to watch my collection of Highlander videos while I'm doing it.

Family Timekeeper.  Through years of scientific research, testing and a highly developed system (all my clocks are 30 minutes fast), I am able to get my entire family to appointments on time.  To date, we have never missed a school bus!  

Organizational Maven.  Just read previous posts for evidence of said brilliance.  (Ok, maybe not all of them)  In the corporate world, I specialized in color-coded filing systems.  In the domestic area, closets and drawers are a specialty, as are toy systems containing lots of eenie-weenie pieces.  It is a known fact that it's a lot easier to organize someone else's stuff than your own.  

Translater.  I have a lot of experience translating KidSpeak into English for the benefit of waitstaff, store clerks, and other members of the public who may not know the language or who have lost their skills.  Apraxic speech patterns also translated.

Lily Gilder.  My husband says I'm quite good at this.  I don't really see it though.